Confidence in Your Future Coaching


Could Instead of Should

Louise Hay is one of my personal heroes for many reasons. She is a seriously powerful thinker, a marvelous writer and has motivated many people to change their lives. You might know her from her books such as You Can Heal Your life, You Can Heal Your Body, The Power is Within, You Can Heal Your Heart.. the list goes on. You also might know her as the Founder of Hay House Publishing. If you don't know of her, definitely worth checking out. She is a seriously kick ass lady.

In her book You Can Heal Your Life, Louise discusses several topics that interest me. One of these is the idea of Should vs. Could. The exercise she explains goes something like this: Take a piece of paper and write down all the things you think you should be doing. 

I should make more money
I should exercise every week
I should go to medical school
I should have kids by 30
I should stop playing the guitar and get a real job

Then, she goes on and says to replace all those should's with could. "If I really wanted to, I could make more money, I could exercise every week, I could go to medical school..." After this exercise, you get to the end of the list and look at all the things that you could do if you really wanted to. The next part is to determine whether you want to or not. Is this something that you want? Is that something you were told that you should want? How might your life be different if you let go of the idea that you should do something and made a choice to either do it or not. We already determined if you really wanted to you could do it. Now you get to decide if you want to. 

This changes the entire sentence! How powerful one word can be. All the should's seem to be a reflection of what someone else thinks. Could is choice. Could gives you freedom and allows you to make a decision. 

What are some of the things on your list that you think you should do? And when you change the wording how does it change your perspective?