Confidence in Your Future Coaching

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Perspectives & Their Outcomes

You know how people say "you choose how you feel" and how annoying it can be? Well, while this phrase can sometimes sound holier-than-thou, it has a good point. Here are a few situations to illustrate this point:

1. An employee comes in late to work because they were out all night partying.
2. You have to eat alone because your friend ditched you to hang out with their significant other.
3. You get woken up in the middle of the night to your upstairs neighbor playing music.

Those are pretty frustrating situations, right? It makes so much sense that you would have negative feelings towards them. Does it feel like you would have a choice in how you feel, or do you feel super justified in being pissed?

What if the following were actually true?

1. An employee comes in late because their family pet passed away this morning.
2. You have to eat alone because your friend is going through a break up. 
3. You get woken up in the middle of the night because your upstairs neighbor has a brand new baby. 

The outcomes of each situation are exactly the same in both examples. Your employee came in late, you have to eat alone, you get woken up. Yet, for some reason, in the second group it seems so much easier to find compassion instead of jumping straight to anger. Your perspective of the situation completely changed. This is where the choice comes into play. We are choosing to immediately feel forgiveness and compassion instead of anger and judgment. Since each of the situations have the exact same outcome, it is clear that there is an element of choice in how you react / feel. 

What are some areas in your life where you are willing to see a situation from a different perspective and choose to change your emotions towards it?